Showing posts with label Celebrity Tool Academy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Celebrity Tool Academy. Show all posts

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Stupid People are Hilarious


I knew there was a reason I should have kept watching "Tool Academy". Brian Cranston deserves an Emmy for his reaction to the Tool Academy finale, which involves a glorious wedding, complete with a "harpoon" player and the "Champion" of Tools (seriously, what an honor) saying his "proposes" to his Kate Moss look-alike wife. Crap, these two geniuses will probably pro-create multiple times before divorcing. 

Friday, January 2, 2009

2009: Just as Appalling As 2008. (Tools Beware!)

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I saw an ad for the following show: 
VH1 has proved that there really is something lower than the "bottom of the barrel" and thy name is "Tool Academy". The worst part is I know that I will not be able to resist watching at least one episode of this debacle - because let's face it, we've all gone out with someone who belonged at the "Tool Academy". Crap - there goes my New Year's Resolution to stop watching detestable reality shows.

The only way to top this would be a spinoff called "Celebrity Tool Academy" (I may have to pitch this to VH1). Top contenders would be the following "celebrities"
  •  Spencer Pratt: no explanation needed
  •  Brody Jenner: dude from "The Hills" and "Bromance", which I'm  proud to say I haven't seen! Does this guy even have a real job or does his resume read:  Work Experience: January, 1999 - Present: Professional DOUCHEBAG.
  • Chris Angel: Sure he has a well paying job, and can even make himself disappear (added bonus) but any man who wears that amount of bling must automatically be put into the "tool" category.
  •  Brett Micheals:  Although, lets be honest, can he fit another reality show into his busy schedule filming back to back episodes of "Rock of Herpes", not to mention all those County Fairs he performs at. 
  • Donald Trump: I know he's already married, but in my book, he's still a Grade A egotistical male chauvinist pig.
  • Kanye West: Just to mix it up a bit.