Last night I was watching TV and a commercial came on for "Chia Pet". These things have been around since the beginning of time (ok, 1982) and yet I don't know anyone who has ever owned one. Maybe I'll forgo the homemade fudge and just get all my loved one's Chia Pets instead. They really are the gift that keeps on giving (providing you water your Chia Ram every week).
Better yet, whatever happened to Ronco, the company that brought us the following Christmas gift gems:
- "Mr. Microphone". I actually got this for Christmas one year. What a piece of shit.
- "Glass Froster" (because putting a beer mug in the freezer for 10 minutes by yourself is such a pain in the ass)
- "Smokeless Ashtray" (something my parents desperately needed when I was growing up. )
- The uber-genius "Inside the Shell Egg Scrambler" (because we all know scrambling an egg ouselves can lead to carpal tunnel syndrom).
- Ronco (or was it K-Tel?)also put out amazing album compilations full of the hottest Disco hits of the all time. I actually got the following album for my birthday in the mid-70's:
"Star Trackin' 76" was on constant rotation on my portable "Winnie the Pooh" turntable. I even put a round ball of tinfoil atop one of my mom's knitting needles, creating a make-shift microphone, so I could play DJ and announce the songs as they were being played. Just call me a young Samantha Ronson (but not as butch).
Anyone over the age of 35 will probably remember these fantastic Ronco ads from Christmases past. If you've never had the pleasure of actually seeing a Ronco product in action, you are in for a treat (check out the duds too - awesome):