CBS has been running the following Public Service Announcement for the past few weeks. Maybe you've had the pleasure of seeing it:
I don't know who this wise guy thinks he is telling my husband to give me a Pap Smear for Christmas, but I'm guessing he's never had the pleasure of having an ice-cold metal speculum shoved up his privates while the doctor makes small talk and then scrapes your innards something resembling a butter knife. Call me old fashioned but I'll take a bottle of CVS brand bubble bath or even one of those Zales gold medallion necklaces that say #1 MOM in lieu of a Pap this Christmas. And if by chance (and that would be like a one-in-a-billion chance) my husband does pick up the phone and call my Doctor (no worries, he has no idea who our doctor is or how to even get a hold of such a person) to schedule a Pap Smear for my holiday cheer, I will gladly return the favor with a Colonoscopy (sans the Valium) for Valentine's Day.