Saturday, December 19, 2009

Christmas Revelry (and all that Jazz)



This year (once again) I just can't get into the Christmas Spirit. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Macy's has had it's Christmas shit out since Halloween, or that the economy is down the tubes and spending money like Micheal Jackson at "Statues R Us" in Las Vegas is just not in the cards for me this year. Even today as I ran errands and the soft rock station played the top 101 Christmas Songs of all times I felt nothing....absolutely nothing.

Then I went to the salon and as I was waiting in the lobby a group of Christmas Carolers sauntered in like it was 1899. We're talking grown adults dressed to the hilts in top hats and long flowing skirts quite possibly made out of clearance bedspreads from Kohls. Of course since it is a chilly California winter day (80 degrees and sunny) they completed the look with green and red capes. I honestly can't imagine what horrible and cruel twist of fate caused these four uber-nerds to think it was fun to spend their days off dressed like extras from "Little House on The Prairie" and singing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer in operatic overtures. As they stood there with shit-eating grins singing so proudly (while the entire Salon ignored them or stared sadly with that "I'm so embarrassed for you" look), I of course frantically texted Parker and tried to figure out a way to take a picture of them without anyone noticing. Then out of the corner of my eye, I saw it....the elder Frau-in-a-bonnet was holding a basket and inside I saw two $1 dollar bills. Oh my lord, I thought....they are singing for tips! Have they not grasped the concept they are in Southern California and not Mayberry? Eventually, they sauntered out of the salon (tipless), skirts bustling and top hats firmly on the gentlemens' heads, for a split fleeting second I almost felt a twinge of Christmas spirit. But then I came to my senses and laughed at what dorks they were. And yes, if you we wondering, I am one of those people who make fun of others in order to make myself feel better.

1 comment:

Spanky said...

Merry f#*@king Christmas