My Coolness is Waning (big time)

I've always thought as myself as the "cool mom" - and by simply saying that, it probably makes me the most uncool Mom on the planet. But I promised to take my son and his friend to the Van's Warped Tour in San Diego on Tuesday - where I learned just how completely uncool I am.

We arrived at 1:00 pm. The Vans Warped Tour is a compilation of about 40 bands playing on like 7 different stages and they are all screaming their freaking heads off. When I arrived I felt older than Carol Channing. And, for some strange reason I just assumed that a musical festival this big would have a special tent for parents, with a flat screen and ample seating. Instead I found a lone canopy with scattered folding chairs near the entrance. This will have to do, I thought. But first I bought myself a $7.00 hot dog with a $6.00 bottle of water. I was tempted to visit the margarita booth - but since I was with children, I thought it best to stay sober. Besides the beer was $12, so I figured they'd probably charge upward of $20 for a cold margarita (and and additional $3 for salt on the rim?).

As much as I enjoyed sitting on a folding chair alone for 4 hours, my favorite part of the day had to have been listening to a nearby band sing one of the most beautiful songs ever written. I didn't get the name of the band or the song, but I did manage to remember a few of the lyrics:

"You're a fu*&ing asshole
Suck my dick
You're a fu*%king whore
Cha ch cha"

Hmmm, romantic. Wasn't that originally a Lou Rawls' song? Although the festival lasted until 9 pm, by 5:00 I was miserable (and broke). My son and his friend were crushed and begged me to stay until one of their favorite bands played at 7:15, but I simply could not do it. I would rather spend a day lost in the circles of Hell than continue to sit there. Let's face it - I practically was in the circle of Hell. Proof once again that I am getting old and loosing my "coolness".