Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Dexter's Garage



After a long and rather uneventful weekend one thing became very clear to me. I'm almost certain that one of my neigbors is "Dexter" (or at least Dexter like). Truly there is no other explanation.

On Saturday I decided to finally take the 4 black Hefty garbage bags of old clothing to the Good Will, thus cleaning out a small portion of my very cluttered garage. In my defense my garage is really the only cluttered part of my house, but that's what garages are for, right?  As I stuffed the giant bags into my Prius I looked across the alley at my neighbors' open garage door and there is was: The most sparkly-could-eat-off-the-floor-clean garage I've ever seen. Seriously it was diabolical. Over the years I've seen the wife actually vacuuming said garage on almost a weekly basis. For Christ's sake they've lived there for like 8 years. Aside from a small television mounted in the corner and a wall where they hang tools (i.e. scapals for cutting up their victims?) the garage is completely empty.

I don't really know these people well, except for the stink eye they give me when they happen to get a glimpse of my open garage, but there most certainly is something wrong with these people.  The most likely conclusion is that they kill people and surgically cut them to pieces in their pristine germ free garage. Dexter would be proud.
-Val

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