Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Email of the Day: Those Damned Jenny Craig Commercials

To: Val@doingthelaundry.com
From: Parker@Don'tEmailMeAtWork.com
Re: Jenny Craig/My fat ass

I just caught a glimpse of my reflection in a window and if I saw Valerie Bertinelli on top of a hilltop right now I would run up to her and say, "Hey Valerie, I'm a size Fat Ass!" and she would turn to me and say, "I'm a size thinner than you and I have Eddie's money."

Oh the humanity.

To: Parker@Don'tEmailMeAtWork.com
From: Val@doinglaundry.com
Re: Jenny Craig/Our Fat Assess

I totally know how you feel. If I saw Queen Latifah right about now I would say, "Hey Queen, can I borrow your biker shorts? Mine are three sizes too small." and she'd say in her I'm-a-size-healthier-happy-voice, "Sure thang sistah."

Honestly, it's bad enough that Star Jones is now thinner than me, but so help me if Queen Latifah drops down to a size 2, I will get my jaw wired. 

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