Friday, August 29, 2008

An Open Letter to Our Moms.

Dear Mom:
For the love of God, it is time to clean out your kitchen pantry. I'm pretty sure you are never going to "dive in" to that can of minced clams that has been sitting there since 1978. When we come for a visit, please don't serve my kids the Frosted Flakes with the "Back to the Future" Michael J. Fox action figure inside. If you haven't heard, cereal can occasionally go stale and, after sitting on the shelf for 20 years, can possibly be deadly. 

While we're at it, let's talk about your refrigerator. When the ice cream starts to resemble the arctic shelf and, if you reach in for a scoop you are in danger of slicing your hand open on a sharp ice-rock, it's time to dump it. Perhaps it might also be a good idea to store your dog's suppositories someplace other than the butter compartment. And lastly, it's amazing those eggs haven't hatched into some mutant chicken-monster, considering they've been in there since the dawn of time.

Love you!

-Your Daughters.

1 comment:

Michele said...

So funny! I actually was feeling energetic and cleaned out my pantry last week. Some scary stuff in there!