Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving + PMS = No Good

Happy Thanksgiving. Unfortunately I have a raging case of PMS which peaked yesterday as I was cleaning my house. As I went from room to room (complaining like a 90 year old Jewish lady) my kids were methodically following me around messing up the house. At some point I turned into a cross between the Cloverfield Monster and Debra Winger in Terms of Endearment when she screams at her kids in the Pick N Save parking lot. When I asked my son to rake the leaves outside he looked at me like I was speaking Russian. At that point the voice of Satan took over and I literally screamed "Rake the God Damned Leaves". That set him straight. I even managed to start a almost deadly kitchen fire (all without even cooking a thing - its a long story). Despite the back-breaking cramps and my flaring temper, I managed to get the house ready. Today the cramps are worse than ever, but I'm armed with a hidden stash of Xanax (only for emergency) and if necessary several bottles of Chardonnay. 
Hope everyone has a safe and Happy Holiday.

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