Wednesday, December 31, 2008

What a Crock of Shizzzzz....



Sure whatever you say, politically incorrect magazine ad from the 1970's. Right about now I could use about 6 Midols and "My Guy" is definitely NOT the "No. 1 reason." 

What IS the reason I might be needing a handful of Midols you ask? How about the fact that I feel like Aretha Franklin after a binge at the Hometown Buffet. Maybe its because my back feels like I've been working on a prison chain gang digging ditches for the last 72 hours. Or maybe because aside from the bloating and backache, I've gone though a double-decker chocolate cookie tin from Costco that my evil father brought over on Christmas to make the holidays more "Festive" (i.e. to turn me into a "fat ass"). Or perhaps I need the Midol because last night when I came downstairs and discovered an empty gallon of Dryers Vanilla Bean Ice Cream that my children had devoured in a 24-hour period, I began screaming like a delusional homeless lady that the only good that can come from annihilating a gallon of ice cream while playing video games all day is a "big butt and diabetes". Sorry Kids, it was the PMS taking.

As for "Your Guy" (pictured above), well he can take his patchwork cowboy shirt, and disco medallion and shove it.

Happy New Year. I'll be celebrating by watching Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin while enjoying a Midoltini.

-Val

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog and you two are the best! I laugh with each of your stories, totally relate!! Happy New Year!

Jenn said...

Where can I find a readable version of this picture? It looks like a classic "What you must do to change yourself to make a man happy" ads and articles. I bet this ad was done by a man, same with that "Have a happy period" campaign from Always.

Hope you're having a good New Year's Day!